The Good, The Bad and the Ugly Films

GOOD: BRAD BIRD

The guy who brought us the animated classics “The Iron Giant” and “The Incredibles” has been tapped to direct the next “Mission: Impossible”. I love this notion – Imagine how cool this film will be with all the cool tech and spy stuff that we saw in his previous efforts? Hoping this goes very well for Brad Bird.

BAD:  A New Scary MPAA Warning Label

If the MPAA hasn’t scared you in the past – warning us of films that may contain: Violence, Extreme Violence, Gory Violence, Brief Nudity, Nudity, Full Nudity, Drug Use, Drug References, Drug Abuse, Nicole Kidman, Coarse Language, Profanity, Extreme Coarse Language, Sexual Language etc. etc. etc… There’s a new kid on the block: MATERNAL NUDITY!

The MPAA has decided to warn the 3 people who will likely see the new documentary “Babies” this weekend that the film contains MATERNAL NUDITY! First of all, who is being warned about this? I’m kind of excited. I mean “Iron Man 2″ doesn’t have any MATERNAL NUDITY. Maybe if “Iron Man 2″ did have bosom sucking, it wouldn’t have sucked in so many other ways. My review shortly…

UGLY: “Nine, Nein, Nein!!!”

"Nine" is a feature film extravaganza that features 6 very talented and
beautiful actresses, and Nicole Kidman. I happen to be a straight guy
that likes musicals, so I picked up the new Blu Ray on Tuesday - having
missed the film when it briefly appeared in theatres last Fall. I still
can't figure out why this movie cost so much, but it's enjoyable
nonetheless. Perhaps it was the cost of CG to make Sophia Loren look
like she's still younger than 100. The songs are catchy, and the setting
in 1960s Italy is beautifully constructed. I didn't like Fergie the
Whore's song (What?! She plays a whore... sheesh!). It was called
"Italia", I think, but throughout the song I kept hoping she'd just
switch over to singing about her humps, her humps, her lovely lady
lumps. Penelope Cruz is stunning as usual as the Mistress to this aloof
director played by Daniel Day Lewis. Both solid performances, as usual.
I also thought Judi Dench did a great job as part of the fictional
production team. Then there's Marion Cotillard, playing the wife of the
director, who has an uncanny semblance to Audrey Hepburn. I hadn't
followed Cotillard's career thus far, but now I'm intrigued to check it
out. Kate Hudson has a brief turn as a reporter - just enough screen
time without derailing the ensemble cast. Wonderful support from other
minor roles such as Ricky Tognazzi and Andrea Di Stefano. A much better
follow-up by Rob Marshall to his Oscar Winning work 'Chicago'. It's sad
that this movie got lost in the shuffle last year. Nicole Kidman. 
So why is this whole thing ugly? Well... I bought the Blu Ray for $28.99
on Tuesday. That's a pretty good deal. On Wednesday, however, the same
store was selling it for $27.99 - but here's the catch - it came bundled
with a Blu Ray of "Sex in the City". WTF!? I went to exchange the Blu
Ray for a dollar less, but was told I also would have to pick up "Sex
and the City". The Hell! I was being forced to take "Sex in the City"
for a dollar. I wasn't going to fall for such a sloppy bribe. And what
does something like "Nine" have anything in relation to "Sex in the
City". Are they supposed to appeal to the same demographic? This
conundrum haunted me the last few days. Sleepless nights. Until I
finally had to jot it all down at 3AM. My comparison started out a bit
choppy, but then ideas started to flow together and everything make
sense in crystal clear clarity...